Hello,
So I didn't ask you to confirm the jingle for me.
I asked you if YOU use the confirmation jingle?
So second night you don't enter the room at all unless there is a crisis, then you enter and buff him calm and exit with the jingle.
2. The reminder How does the crying sound? Is it cranking up or winding down? Don't be in too much of a hurry. If Gustaf sounds like he is going to go ballistic, you will have to go back in and give him the message again, in accordance with the instructions above, but in a much abbreviated form. We are maybe talking about a minute. The goal is to get his body to go slack and to silence his crying, but if he does not fall completely silent, he should at least sound much calmer. Exit again, saying the jingle. The reminder's power lies in the jingle not the patting. Wait outside the door. Say the next jingle after a couple of minutes. Adjust your tone of voice. You sound very decisive. Listen. Is the baby “answering” you? Does he sound as though he is listening? Good. Keep waiting. The four-verse jingle (in exceptional cases the six-verse version) should take less than 30 seconds.
The gap between the rounds of jingles whether you use the four-verse or six-verse variety, should all the while be lengthening considerably, but you can still “jingle” every other minute if necessary. If he is really working himself up into a frenzy and it gets to the point where you know that the jingle is having no effect at all, give the bottom patting message again, but keep it really short. We're talking maybe 15-20 seconds tops. For example three rounds of bottom patting (four pats to a round) with light pressure applied to the back with every fourth pat. Then head immediately for the door with a four-verse jingle in a this-is-final tone of voice. Wait for a reaction, listen, and give another reminder. Remind as often as is necessary. Stay alert and listen for when he is truly quiet at last. Then it is time for the crucially important final stage.
3. The confirmation. Repeat the jingle, but softly and reassuringly now . The goal here is to gently confirm that this is the end of the “discussion” - quite literally the last word. Your soft tone of voice says. “You've got it! Very good! That's just what you're supposed to do when you want a good night's sleep.” At the first confirmation jingle, the recently silent baby will probably protest again, but this is no big deal. It's temporary and will disappear, most probably on the first night.
I know that when you do the cure, you are so sleep deprived that you usually read things with different eyes then you do when you are well rested. This is why we keep urging you to read, re-read and then read again. Because we read things with different eyes depending on how we feel, where we are in the cure, the results and so on.
So this second night to be very clear (you can also read the last part in the book where Anna writes about how the cure can work when she does it) You enter the room after the top off and the laughter. The room is already pitch dark, you fly in like an airplane, you exit the room with the jingle. Vers 1 (x1) on you way out, vers 2 (x1) as you close the door, vers 3 (x1) with the door closed and the last vers 4 (x1) outside the door with a happy steady voice. (=x4 all together)
If he reacts you let him react, you LISTEN, what is the question? Depending on how the sound is, what the question is, you use the tone of your voice to answer with the jingle X4 outside the room with the door closed. He should then either be quiet and listen, or he might just get very upset and angry with you. LISTEN! What is the question? So the key with the jingle and the listening is the magic with the cure. You don't enter, you are the guard outside with the gun protecting him, and your job is to convince him of just that! (the safari)
You are safe and sound you can now sleep.
When he is quiet, you give the confirmation jingle X4. THis is the Pavlos dog principle. Also outside of the room with the door closed!
If he reacts to this, you start over with the jingle "the reminder" and so on. The confirmation jingle X4 always has the last word.
If night 2 goes without a big hassle then you can combine the regular jingle with the confirmation jingle. That means you say the jingle X3 and the confirmation X1 = X4.
X6 is for the BIG questions that really needs convincing. That is why you practice this.
So as you go through the nights, keep reading, you WILL see that you the first time read something in a certain way, and by the third night you read the same but with different eyes.
I remember when I started the FTLOC with my son and after 2 months came to this forum. After a few months here I wrote the post "like the devil reads the bible"
I only saw some parts and didn't see the whole picture. Sometimes we get so narrow minded in the "tools" we forget the "attitude of total confidence" which is more important. Or we only look at the night and don't understand that the whole 24 hours is what matters. Like food, most parents think it is what they eat right before bed that will determine the night. But it is the amount of food over the whole day that determines the night and sometimes not the same night but the night after.
This is why we look at the schedule so closely, why we talk about being outside 1 hour am and 1 hour pm as the grow older.
The biggest problem for us here is that we all do this on our own spare time, noone is paid and we all had to make our own mistakes and got nothing served. That is why we try to answer as much and as often as we can. We are all just mothers doing our best to live by Anna W child filosofy. I just happened to be trained by her as well and cure a lot of babies. So we all do this as a "pay it forward" thanks to Anna for saving our lives, for free.
