3 month old hyper-active Christian - will he finally sleep?!

[Olga Gavrilkina]

Hi!

I am a mother of a very active 3-month old boy. Sometimes it feels like he is too active for his age ...
We are experiencing a very bad day and night sleeps I am reading GNS Cure book now and planning to apply its method when Christian will be at least 4-4.5 month old. However, I wonder if you could suggest / recommend something at this stage already. Another sleepless month will drive me and my husband crazy

We have some sort of schedule, but not so strict at this age.

Goes to bed at night @ 19…21.30
Wakes up @ 5…6..7 in the morning
Eats every 3-3.3 hour ( no breastfeeding at all)
I feed him at nights 2-3 times ( bottle feeding only )
During the day he takes a nap 40min..up to 2.5 hours long, with 1.5-2hour interval ( total 3-4naps during the day )

Once or couple times a week we have a really good nights : Christian eats 2-3times and falls asleep immediately. Intervals between feedings : 3-3.5 hours.

But mostly we have horrible nights. Son wakes up between feedings, because he hits himself with his hands and legs and then starts crying. Last night was terrible. I woke up every hour and saw the same picture: Christian was literally jumping out of his bed, waving his hands and legs in every possible direction. Stretching his body out. Looks like he’s having colics, but it shouldn’t be. I tried to fix him with a blanket but it only got worse, he woke up and started to cry. I didn’t take him outta his bed, but tried to calm him down there. Sometimes it worked out. At 5 am in the morning he starts to ”run” again in his cot, so I took him to our bed, fixed tightly with a blanket and hugged him so he could stop waving his hands and legs. Only then he managed to sleep till 7am..and as usual I didn’t.
I put him every time on the different side, somehow tried to change his sleeping position. He stopped sleeping on his tummy a long time ago. And every time I try to put Christian on a tummy he starts crying hysterically ( Sleeping on the back is risky too.. sometimes it helps, but usually doesn’t. Swaddling doesn’t help - only gets worse.
Ive tried to feed him before bedtime, it helped only for 2.5 hours , after that he wakes up. Our bedroom is pretty chill and Christian has a very good sleeping conditions.. but something is definitely wrong.
I also used a little buffing yesterday to try to calm down him, but effortless Screams all the time.
We have analogical picture with day naps.. need to hold him or fix with the blanket, so he could calm down and sleep. But I need to be near him all this time while he is sleeping so I could fix a blanket or dummy or change his position so Christian could continue sleeping. Actually it’s pretty hard, because Id like to do something else / rest while he is sleeping, not to guard him all the time

I hope that there is something that could help us.. at least a little bit. Because we are so exhausted at this point already…
Can we start GNS cure now or should we wait until Christian gets 4-4.5 month old ? Maybe we could use some other method or tricks to calm him down and make him sleep

Im looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Regards,
Olga

[TorsMamma]

Hi Olga and welcome!

If you are good at reading English I would highly recommend you gett the FTLoC book, For the Love of Children that addresses many of you questions and more, it is a whole filosofi.

According to that we like to set a schedule for them at 3 months old and usually we do the rhythm 12+45+2+45 which means 12 hours night, 45 min am nap, 2 hours midday nap and 45 min pm nap. We put food in there between 3-3,5 hours and you put a bigger nipple on the bottle so he can eat faster and more.
At night we like setting the clock to about 3-4 am and feed and I suggest you feed no matter what even in his sleep at this time is good.

Also babies at this age with difficulties sleeping you can preferably put on his belly with a sleep apnea alarm!! And stick to the belly, don't test anything else, he will get used to it I promise! Now, put him in a pram not the bed, the bed is to big for him, just like you say he needs it tighter and the pram might just do that for him! No pillow, in the pram and we do pull it forth and pack to calm them down, not putting them to sleep, just calming them down. Here is a video how we do this with extremely upset babies! Now, you set a schedule you keep the times exactly and use the pram is my suggestion on his belly with an alarm. You can also very slowly give him small tastes of food now, like sweet potato just to see if this will help him sleep some more.

https://youtu.be/E595CP947Vc

https://youtu.be/H9UN-0_wYSg

I know these are in Swedish but I hope it will give you and idea. Stop as soon as he doesn't scream anymore NOT fall asleep! You might have to do it 20 times, but he will learn, he is only 3 months old, a small child like this will learn what you teach him!

[Olga Gavrilkina]

Hi!

Thank you for your respond!

I have a question about feeling at night. Christian wakes up by himself 2.5-3h later after the last feeding, starts getting upset and cries so I usually give him a bottle, so he calms down and falls asleep for a while. If I will wait until 3-4 am it might get only worse
What should I do?

[Tin]

Hello,
until you have locked in a schedule (TorsMamma gave you a perfect model for your babies age) and follow it strictly there is no point not feeding him when he wakes up after 2.5 h. So feed him and put him back.

Now, it is BECAUSE you follow a suitable schedule for feeding and sleeping that you then can stop the night feeds but it sound like you haven't started yet. So sit down and scribble down a schedule that follows the 12-45-2-45 model and decide on a day to start (if you need inspiration search here on the forum).
Start on a MORNING, so that food and sleep in the daytime is right before you have any hope of fixing the nights. Be super strict with sleep times and food times, that means waking them up after 45 min. And have him eat as much as he possible can.
Put him to sleep on his tummy with a sleep apne alarm, yes he can do it. And basically everything else that TorsMamma already said in her answer.

But this is a system, it in not a quick fix. As so many other things, if its worth doing its worth doing well.
You have to put the work in for the baby to respond, and I know that it an sound overwhelming when you are sleep deprived (ive been there) but just dive in and do it. You can turn this around. You can.

hugs Tin

[Olga Gavrilkina]

Hi!

As much as I’ve tried to put Christian on his tummy and calm down- effortless He just cries so badly.. I just can’t imagine how he could possibly get to sleep in pram like this
Last night was horrbile again, he only calmed down on my hands and it took 5-10 minutes each time he woke up. And he woked up every hour.. (
So, in the end of this: he got up at 7am.. had his last feeding at 5am .. and now it’s 9am and he didn’t eat just don’t want to. Is it because of lack of sleeping??

[Tin]

Ok hi again,
sorry to hear about your night. I an hear that you dont quite believe in tummy sleeping, but if you dont believe in it how do you think you are going to convince Christian that this is how you sleep? He can read you insecurity about it and that is why he cries. You have to be a strong, calm, safe leader in this.

You have to start at the beginning. And you have to learn the theory.

So what does your schedule look like that follows 12 h, first nap 45 min, lunch nap 2 h, and afternoon nap of 45 min, what are the exact times for sleep and food?

Tin

[TorsMamma]

I'll also fill in, if he eats during the night, how do think he will eat during the day? If he eats 2-3 times at night he only needs to eat 2-3 times during the day and will never feel hungry during the day.

Please get "For the Love of Children" read it and you will understand how everything works together. But read read read.

[Olga Gavrilkina]

Hi!

We would try one of the schedule examples from GNS Book.

Night 8pm - 7am
Bottle 7am
1.st nap 8.30-10.00am(1.5h)
Bottle 10am
2nd nap 11.30am- 1.00pm (1.5h)
Bottle 1.00pm
3.rd nap 3.00-3.45pm ( 45min)
Bottle 4pm
4. Nap 5.45-6.30 pm ( 45min)
Top up 7.30pm
Night 8pm

But suddenly yesterday everything’ s changed:((
Feeding intervals increased up to 4-5.5 hours...
And it’s hard to make a new schedule and stick with it beacuse for example today he ate at 4.30am, woke up at 6.30am didn’t eat at all and fall asleep at 8.00am..Does he change his own feeding schedule or should I be concern about his wellbeing??
It’s been like a lottery yesterday: will I pick up the right time to feed him or not. And more than that Christian doesn’t complain or cry, so I can’t tell if he is hungry or not..
And I’ve try to give him top ups before night sleep, if he doesn’t want so he just won’t take it. Turns his head away and that’s it.
Very hard to make him eat. Though I tried to calm him down- took him and walked in the room, tried to be soft and gentle, spoke to him.. but still no results.
What should I do?

[TorsMamma]

Hi Olga,

You should read all the answers we already gave you! There is no button to push no quick fix for this. Only read read read read especially the book I asked you to get.

Please re-read this thread again and again.